Friday, January 13, 2006

Week 2: Date Report. You be the Judge

Date 1. Wednesday, I go out with only Jims. I have lunch with Jim #1 at the bento place. Luckily, Sun (the woman who takes the orders) didn't ask where Matt was. I always eat lunch there with Matt, and she's asked about him in the past. (although if she did ask, I could blame Matt for interfering with yet another of my prospects- there's always a bright side!)

But this Jim, honestly I just don't click with, and don't want to go on another date. It turns out he works in the building right next to mine . How crazy is that? I'll probably run into him every day for the next year.

But bonus points for me!!! It's also the same building where, on this same Wednesday, the security guard asks for my phone number. He's really cute, has kids already (but claims not to be married) and takes them camping at Timothy Lake. I know nothing else about him, although I walk though there every day soaking wet from my bike ride and carrying coffee.

Date 2. Jim #2 is actually Ultramarathoner from last week (see week 1, date 3). It turns out we have the same favorite restaurant; Indian. Dinner is fun, slightly awkward at times (he takes less initiative than I'm used to, but that's fine). We talk politics. He's middle of the road, but at least doesn't like Bush. He was interested in my views, and didn't seem to mind my left leanings. After dinner, we go to a nearby McMenamins and have a couple beers. Then he drives me and my bike home because I STILL can't find my rain pants and it's started to pour. Thank goodness for that SUV. I think he wanted a kiss, but I avoid it.

Thursday, January 12, 2006

Week Two: Part 1

I have a list of criteria I'm looking for, and clearly I'm having difficulty weeding people out. Maybe you can help? Here's some of the list:

Wants kids
has compassion for people around him
Does something about improving the world
Intelligent
Makes me laugh/has a sense of humor
Has a social support network
Someone I can learn from
Has values/morals I can respect
Healthy

Doesn't sound too ambitious does it? Or maybe that's why I'm still single.

Week One: You be the Judge. Date Report

So after that longwinded first post, here's the date report.

Date 1: Banker. We go to a local trivia night - his idea. And a good one. We can't do the Sudukus, despite my housemate's prowess in this field. Banker knows many of the trivia answers, and is probably horrified at my lack of knowledge. But he doesn't believe one of my answers, doesn't write it down, and it turns out to be right (it was just a guess on my part).
He knows almost as little about I do about pop culture (no REALLY!). I'll go out with him again.

Date 2: Ferret Man. Crawford has a drawl, is tall and gangly looking, and is obsessed with ferrets. OK - "obsessed" might be a bit strong, but he had a lot to say about the ferret shelter his ferrets came from, the people who ran the ferret shelter, and how they got into the whole ferret business in Oregon City. Luckily, just one of his two ferrets stinks.
He mutters more than the average bear, but when I can hear it, it's generally funny. Maybe my hearing is going? He knows every Metallica song that plays on the jukebox, and doesn't play pool. And since this is my second date out of three, I'm not inclined to take up the slack during pauses in the conversation. But he does - he actually asks me interesting questions, and listens to the answers. So I'll go on another date with him.

Date 3: Ultramarathoner. Ok, I'd never heard of an ultramarathon before - have you? It's where you run over 100 miles. The longest he's run is 150 miles somewhere in Greece. And you know the crazy thing? He claims OTHER people actually do this too! Whew, what a nut. But otherwise, he's intelligent, interesting, and we have a good conversation. The only red flag is he drives a huge SUV (not a hummer or anything like that) but you know my politics, right? Oh and the other red flag - he's taking a month off work to run from the English channel in France to the Mediterranean. Has he never heard of a Europass?
But I have fun talking to him, so, you guessed it, another date is in order.

Week One: Three Dates Per Week

So, my New Year's goal is to go on three dates per week from now until April 1. "Why?" you ask. Let me tell you. I'm 38, unmarried and single. I'd like to have my own kids (although I LOVE everyone else's - thanks for sharing!). Agewise, the % of children with developmental disabilities born to mothers age 38 is SKY HIGH, and will only get worse the older I get. And I'm not meeting anyone I like through friends or my usual activities. Although I have a couple of *awesome* friends willing to go out on a limb and set me up (Tara, Jennifer, this means you!) nothing has actually worked out yet.

So what's the solution? I've signed up for match.com, salon.com, and eharmony. I respond daily to emails, no matter how tired I am, and wink at people every once in awhile.

I figure that if I go on enough dates, I'm bound to meet a life partner. Or at least I'll have fun trying, AND get to drink beer in the process!

On the positive side, I love meeting people, like to hear new ideas, and don't generally find blind dates uncomfortable. On the negative side, I generally like everyone, I don't want to hurt people's feelings, and I overcompensate to make people feel comfortable and happy. As a result,

1) I don't always tell people what I'm really thinking
2) I don't decide if I like the guy, because I'm too busy being likeable
3) I decide I like or don't like people for the wrong reasons, and
4) So far, everyone wants a second date.